As the Year Closes

As the year closes, I'd like to take a bit to reflect on the events of the year. It's a great time to just stop, take stock of what you've accomplished, and look back on all the good things that have happened. It's a great time to measure just how far you've come along. This will be the first New Years I celebrate as Sara, so it's of special significance to me now.

I know this sort of "giving thanks for the blessings we have" is more of a Thanksgiving thing (hence, I suppose, the clever name), but you know what? To heck with it - it's my blog, and I'll gush if I want to! So, without further ado...

In the Beginning, Pt. 5

Continued from part 4, found here.

This is the final part of the story of how I discovered I was trans, and went about beginning my transition to Sara. It has been a long, emotional journey for me, and has stirred up more emotion than I thought I had left in me about these events. Even still, if telling this story can help even one person, all the pain that writing it - especially part 4 - has dredged up will be worth it. Thank you for reading it... and for those of you who didn't know any of this, and have recently come back into my life after years of not seeing me, this is pretty much everything you missed while I was gone. As usual, if there are any questions, please ask, I never leave an honest question unanswered.

In the Beginning, Pt. 4

Continued from part 3, found here...

This is part 4 or the story of how I discovered I was trans, and began my transition to the woman you know and love today. This portion was pretty difficult for me to write, as it details the darkest moments of my life thus far. I'm certain my words don't do the darkness I felt justice, but I've tried, so you can get a sense - if you're cisgendered - of the type of torment us transsexuals go through in dealing with this condition.

When we last left off, I had moved in with some friends near the local LGBT support center, to help them save their house from foreclosure...

In the Beginning, Pt. 3

Continued from part 2, found here.

This continues part 3 of the story of how I came to realize I was transsexual, and eventually transitioned to female. Thus far, I'd found out I had a penchant for crossdressing at a Halloween party, and been steadily crossdressing more and more in the privacy of my own home since that point. Then, I got adventurous, and asked my wife if she'd be willing to accompany me to the gay bar, so I could go out dressed up...

In the Beginning, Pt. 2

Continued from part 1, found here.

This is the second part of the story of how I discovered I was trans, and came to become the woman you all know. I don't know how many parts this will take to tell, but I intend to tell it all, and hopefully some of you will find some understanding, and some may find a kindred spirit.

When last we left off, I had crossdressed for the first time, for a Halloween party in 2006. I felt invigorated like I never have before...

In the Beginning, Pt. 1

I spent the evening looking over the blog posts I had written, the stories I had told, and the feelings I had shared, searching for the next topic I would pour my heart into. For a while, it eluded me, as writer's block threatened to destroy the evening for me and make my next blog post later than I wanted. Then, I realized I had never once mentioned how it was I came to realize I was trans, after all those years of living - seemingly happily - as a cisgender man. Also, recently there have been several old friends coming back into my life, and I'm sure you'd all like an explanation of what the heck you missed!

Be warned, this is a long story, so I'll be breaking it into parts, and releasing them over the next several days. This begins part 1…

Defective and Proud

Okay, I don't normally do this sort of thing, but I found myself very drawn in by this comment, and I feel a direct need to respond to it. I've already said a lot of these things in a previous post, but I think some of this could use some elaboration. Also, I don't want this person to feel like I'm singling them out - I suppose in a way I am by posting their comment again here and directly replying to it in it's own tidy little blog post, but I want this abundantly clear : I've heard this sort of thing from lots of people, many of whom were trans. Thus, Andy, you are not alone here, but it was your comment that got me thinking about this, so it's your comment I will reply to directly. I wish to note, also, I'm not certain you're wrong... I just think that, being that I live this life and you do not, your words become a bit misguided and idealistic. This is, though, my only opinion. I thank you and respect you for yours, and I intend this as a counterpoint, not a malicious attack.

With no further ado, Andy writes:

Bad News

As a transwoman dedicated to the betterment of her own demographic, I see it as my civic duty to keep up on the issues in our government and in the news headlines effecting the transgender community. It's not especially difficult to do - there are many sources, in this internet age, to find this information at my fingertips with the click of a mouse. Now, admittedly, I don't focus much on the governmental news. It's not that I don't think it's important, because I know it is, but my brain has this sort of selective dyslexia when it comes to math or legal-speak. I stare at it, and I can read the words, but when it comes to stringing those words into comprehensive thoughts in my brain, it instead melts into sludge and my eyes glaze over. I literally will read some things four or five times before I just say, "Screw it," resign myself to the fact that I do not understand it, and move on. Social matters, however, I find far easier to deal with, because I understand people a lot better than I understand legal mumbo-jumbo.

Passing Thoughts pt.5

My grandmother sent me a birthday card, and a small note inside of it. The birthday card was generic, stating "A Friendly Thought For YOU" on the front and displaying some roses rendered beautifully in watercolors. Inside, she penned a happy birthday wish from herself and my grandfather. The note went into more detail.

Normal

This last weekend was my birthday. I turned 32 - a mile marker I'm not sure I ever expected I'd make it to, ten years ago. As birthdays go, it was pretty plain. There was no big party, no drunken debauchery, no fan fair, which is usually the way I like them. My birthdays have always just been quiet weekends of temprant self-indulgence; a night of karaoke at the bar with a few friends, or just sitting around, ordering a pizza, and doing nothing all night with a friend or two. This year, almost the entire weekend was spent with my parents.

A letter to ABC, regarding "Work It"

A letter to the creators of the new ABC series, "Work It":

To whom it may concern:

You may have noticed, there is a bit of outcry from the transgender community regarding your upcoming sitcom, "Work It." Words like, "transphobic" have been thrown around, petitions are being signed, and I'm willing to bet you are taken a bit by surprise by all of this. In an effort to phrase the argument more eloquently for you, and without a hint of angst or accusation - because I do not believe that your show was created with nefarious intent - I write you this letter on behalf of the transgender community.